This little anecdote from my father made me laugh and I wanted to record it for posterity for my own amusement. It came from his 80-year-old neighbour (who, for the record, hasn't lost his marbles).
I suspect you have to know a bit about the character to find it amusing, but if I ever write a novel, this little monologue will slip in. It's language and style from another era (but firmly rooted in northern England). As an exercise in style, I tried to write it phonetically to capture the accent. Not sure it works, but here goes:
"Y'alright Dave?"
"If thez one thing ah carn't bloody stand, it's cheats"
"Ar've bin watching that program, "The Weakest Link" an' y'know what? The strongest link always gets t'end and then t'others vote 'em off and thee never win!"
"People t'day ave no scruples!"
"An another thing ah can't bloody stand is liars"
"Ah bought these trousers las' week and thee said thee were non-crease"
"Bloody creases everywhere, the lying buggers. Med in Britain too!"
"Y'know whats t'worst in all that Dave? Ah can't bloody stand ironing".
And off he went.
I hope it doesn't come over as mockery, because I know and love the guy (I have known him all my life) and he's never short of an off-the-wall comment. I hope he has many years left if only so I can get some more for the novel...
Tuesday, 4 September 2007
A Brian Monologue
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6 comments:
Ha ha, that really made me laugh! Excellent work on putting the accents into words by the way.
Thanks John.
The story was funny because I know the guy, but when I re-read it, I thought it might not come across so well, so I tried to add the accent to make the conversation more like it really was (if that makes sense!)
Try to write your next article with a Scottish accent...
I'll try, but I'd need to use subtitles!
It's nay eazi, a tell ye
Being a Yorkshire Lass and having quite a strong accent which I bloody well hate!!! I found that post so funny and reminded me a lot of how my uncle is about things!
I hated my strong northern accent when I was younger and especially after I moved away from home - I thought it would be a handicap to me.
I moved "darn sarf" and people were unable to understand me (for example, in a pub, if I asked for a Coke, it was with a rounded o, but for the locals it was a cow-k.
Now I've only traces of my accent left and I find it a bit of a shame.
At least I have a strong English accent when I speak in French!
Be proud - Long live regional accents!
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